Got fired from his job as a Chimney Sweep for not knowing all the words to Chim Chim Cher-ee.  When optimally baked, has a sublime ability to communicate with animals, babies and the essence of inanimate objects. Plays guitar and smokes Indica; but not in that order.


Fancies himself a “Lady’s man” and has been fond of the fair sex since kindergarten because he never had what Freud described as a Latency Period.  Known for boundless energy due to smoking Sativa laced with Flintstones’s Vitamins, and is subject to rampant paranoia when oven-baked. Proudly plays the 12-string guitar, even though he contends that he “only gots 10 fingers bro”!  Cousin of Gonj.


Inventor, Classicist, Chess and Fencing Master.  Retired Latin professor, spent time in county prison for flooding a school board meeting with clouds of T.H.C. gas in an effort to establish collegiality.  Uncle of Gonj and Duby.


Special agent for the Federal Bureau of Investigation, Chess and Fencing master, and former ace Latin student of Unky Cush. His mission: to bring Professor Cush (and his nephews) to justice.

“Aye, aye! and I’ll chase him round Good Hope, and round the Horn, and round the Norway Maelstrom, and round perdition’s flames before I give him up.” – Herman Mellville